Sex Always Has To Have Meaning

I always hate the idea of meaningless sex. Every time I had sex, the women were put into two categories. Either she was a girl I was dating or a good friend. Never have I just had sex with a random stranger to just have sex.

Without sounding egotistical, I can probably go out and find a random girl to do….but I choose not to. That is meaningless sex. What’s the point of that? To just get off and go home after. I find the whole idea foreign.

Now to partially contradict myself. Sex with a friend is entirely different. You can have sex with a friend if both of you are clear about the outcome. You have to be honest about what the situation is so nobody gets hurt. That’s the last thing I would ever want to do to someone.

I don’t view sex as an animalistic ritual. I simply see it as two people having fun. It’s like when your hanging out with the person not having sex with her. You joke around, you laugh, you have fun. That’s the kind if emotion to put into the bedroom.

Yes, obviously it feels good, but try to make it a more relaxed situation. I don’t want sex to simply be “I’m horney and you’re on your back”. It takes the whole fun out of it by making into that.

Two people can just have sex and afterwards not date. That doesn’t mean that it was meaningless. It means simply you are two friends that had sex. It isn’t something that you have to go bragging about. I don’t brag about every time I hang out with someone.

Joe Reyes

Why “I’m Sorry” Is A Meaningless Phrase

I always hated when people say “I’m Sorry” because they think saying it is enough. Some people believe that spilling your gut out saying how sorry you are actually changes anything. It doesn’t at all.

Let’s look at what the definition of “I’m Sorry” is:

1. Feeling or expressing sympathy, pity, or regret: I’m sorry I’m late.

2. Worthless or inferior; paltry: a sorry excuse.

3. Causing sorrow, grief, or misfortune; grievous: a sorry development.

Yeah that’s nice, but it still doesn’t change anything. Does it make up for anything? Not at all. Just saying the words is almost like an empty promise.

Here is how I apologize for something. It’s really complicated so you might want to reread this part: You do something nice for the person you wronged. It’s as simple as that. It doesn’t even need to be something extravagant. Just being a friend and talking is sometimes enough. Buy a meal, make the person feel good, joke around…..something! You can’t just say the words and expect everything to be okay in the end.

It’s almost like when you tell someone “I love you”. What sounds better?

Me saying “I love you”

Or

Me going above and beyond to make you feel great about being with me. Doing some kind of gesture that shows how much I enjoy being around you. And then saying “I love you”

I’m pretty sure people want the second option over the first option.

Now you don’t have to go over the top about an apology. Here’s some examples of how I apologized to some people:

  1. Some girl wanted to hang out and the day of something came up that I had to go to. There was no way around it. So I called her and told her everything, I said how “sorry” I was about letting her down. THEN I told her when I’m free next and made sure I was available that day and when we hung out made it a great day for her.
  2. I got into a fight with a co-worker and it got pretty heated. It was the Tuesday before Thanksgiving and I had Wednesday off. So I came back Friday after the two day break. We saw each other, he came up and said he was sorry for what he said and didn’t mean to offend me. I shook his hand and I said I was equally at fault.  After that I asked how his Thanksgiving went and he asked how mine went. That day we talked about basketball and a multitude of other things that rest of the day. Then every day at work we talked and joked around…..likes friends would.

These were just 2 examples of times where I said I was “sorry”, but you can clearly see it didn’t just end with the words. You know what the worst kind of apology is? Saying “I’m sorry” and then doing nothing after. Silence isn’t the answer. It never is, but for some reason this is the road most people take.

Someone said it the best way to me. He said “Joe, everyone can’t be you” and he was right. Now I’m not perfect. I never went around saying I am, but I’m smart enough to know that there is a right way and a wrong way to do things.

Empty words are the same as empty promises. They do nothing, but make the person saying it feel better about themselves. They feel like “what else can I do”, but clearly there are a lot of other things you can do to prove you’re sorry.

Just take a moment and think about it like this. If someone screwed up and you were affected in one way or another, would just the words “I’m sorry” be enough for you?

Joe Reyes

Being An Idiot Is A Choice

                I always hate when people do incredibly dumb things, while fully experiencing and knowing how bad things can get.  Let me explain what I mean. I knew this girl who lived down the road from me. One night she was partying with her friends and decided to go driving. The driver had a few drinks and ended up crashing. The girl was thrown out the window and died on impact.

                Her best fired started a campaign at school selling shirts with her dead friend’s name on it. She got donations for the family and seemed like she got the message of why drinking and driving is bad. Not long after her mother let her sleep over a friend’s house.

                The mother was suspicious that the daughter checked in a few times suspiciously. The mom went out to where her daughter said she was staying for the night. She wasn’t there. The mother waited until her daughter got back with her friends.

                Someone else was driving and pulled into the driveway. The mother saw that there was an open bottle of Vodka in the car. Her best friend was killed a few weeks prior and she was in the car when it happened. Her idea was to get in the car of a person who was drinking? It takes a certain kind of idiot to repeat such actions.

                This is why I don’t believe people can change. If you’re a moron, then you’re going to be a moron for the rest of your life. If you’re a bad person, then you’re not going to wake up a good guy. Even people given all the opportunities in the world screw up.

                Look at the world of sports. Some multimillionaire players still think going to a strip club at 3am is a smart idea. Look at all the players with gun charges and players who just can’t keep their names out of the news.

                It’s not a matter of growing up. Even grownups screw up all the time. Look at all the crime that goes on in the world. Look at all the criminals who have been in and out of jail multiple times. It’s not always a matter of upbringing or environment. Some people grow up in poor neighborhoods and find a way to be a decent person.

                Nobody makes you choose who you want to be. You do it all on your own. People want to blame outside things for the development of the person. Sometimes rock stars are considered corrupt because their lyrics make people do things. No, that’s not how it works.

                It’s irresponsible to blame a program or musician because someone does something bad. I play violent games, I listen to some music with curses, I watch movies where horrific things happen to characters…..do you see me out there replicating those things.

                Back to the point I was making earlier; some people are just idiots. Some people just don’t get it. This girl was in the car when her friend was hurled out the window and smashed her head on the pavement….and she almost replicates the actions that got her friend killed. This girl is an idiot.

Joe Reyes

A Gay Scout Master?

A remember reading a recent story where a Boy Scout Master came out of the closet and admitted he was a homosexual. A few of the parents took their kids out of that Boy Scout troop and sent them to another one. What is the harm in having a gay Scout Master? Because he’s gay does that mean he’s going to try to have sex with my child?

Just because someone is a homosexual, that doesn’t mean they are a sexual deviant. Look at all the straight child molesters out there. The second someone admits they are gay they are automatically perceived as wanting to have sex with every one of the same sex.

I’m a straight male; does that mean I want to have sex with every woman in the world? I worked as a camp counselor for a summer and no parent protested it. I took care of boys and girls. No parent went to my boss and said “I think Joe is going to have sex with my little girl,” not one parent said that.

Are we really that close minded? Do we really think if someone is a homosexual that they are any different than anyone else? So they are attracted to someone of the same sex, doesn’t make them a bad person at all.

A few years ago, homosexuals were deemed weird. People looked down on them and most stayed in the closet so they won’t be ridiculed by society. Today someone comes out of the closet and they are viewed as a hero.

I think a story like this really shows the pigheaded close-minded mentality of some people. Homosexuals are no different from any heterosexual. Who you are attracted to doesn’t label you as a person.

Joe Reyes

 

Making A Come Back

I decided to keep on writing for this site. Recently, I stopped because another one of my blogs was getting a lot more views. I decided to come back because I have this site too. So why not keep writing for it? I’ve gotten many views and followers on this site so obviously people are viewing it. Thank you all for continuing to view my sites and I will start writing very soon. Comment and follow.

Thank you all,

Joe Reyes

Smoke & Mirrors

It’s almost hard to explain, but have you ever learned something’s about someone that completely distorted your view of them. There was this girl I worked with a few years ago She always seemed like the happiest person around.

She was pretty and always looked good. Every time I saw her she was always smiling and had a happy demeanor, even at work. I guess the longer I worked there the longer we talked and then I found out more into her personal life.

I found out that behind that smile and that bubbly personality was a very messed up girl. She has family problems, was always getting high and seemed depressed all the time. I guess after working with her awhile she felt more comfortable with me and started to open up more.

It was sad to hear everything she had to say. Every day there was an new problem going on in her life. I was really taking back by the whole thing because this was a girl that I thought had it all together. Like the title says, it was all “smoke & mirrors”. First impressions on her were a lie. Well, maybe not a lie, it just took a little while to see the real her. It was weird seeing her for what she really was, a sad little girl.

A lot of people do this. They hide who they really are because people will pity and judge them. It’s a sad truth, but it’s true. Even if you not going to judge them, you look at them differently. You always ask how they are and try to cheer them up.

The quote “never judge a book by its cover” goes perfectly with this story and it’s something to always remember. You never know someone until they open up and let the real them out. I’m glad she told me all that, because it really opened my eyes. Like I said before I never would’ve guessed a girl as pretty and nice as that to have such problems. But again, it was all “smoke and mirrors”.

Joe Reyes